Bart Of War
Season
14
Production Code
EABF16
Broadcast Index
S14E21
Episode Number
312
Airdate
18 May 2003
Writer
Marc Wilmore
Director
Michael Polcino
Executive Producer
Al Jean
DVD Commentary
Al Jean
Marc Wilmore
Matt Selman
Kevin Curran
J. Stewart Burns
Michael Price
Tom Gammill
Mike B. Anderson
Editor
Jimmy Heenan
Plot When Marge sees Bart and Milhouse incited to violence after watching an episode of South Park, she tries to turn them onto some good television on the PAX television network. They run out of the room and find themselves outside and bored. After tying a thread to a fly that lands itself inside of the Flanders home, Bart and Milhouse find themselves inside the home, unsupervised. They cause some damage and find Ned's collection of Beatles memorabilia. They drink from cans of a 40-year-old novelty beverage and start to hallucinate, with Bart seeing Milhouse as John Lennon through various stages of his life. Ned and the boys return to their home to find the house "slightly askew," and they flee to their panic room and call the police. The police arrive and capture the boys and Bart pleads that their parents not be called. The parents are called and as part of Bart and Milhouse's punishment, they are sentenced to spending all their time under parent supervision. Bart is also no longer allowed to play with Milhouse, who Marge believes incites Bart into his bad behavior.

Bart joins the "Pre-Teen Braves" and Homer becomes the tribe leader. When Homer fails in his leadership skills, Marge takes over. Marge takes the boys on a nature walk and they meet a Native American who shows them a field that is in need of restoration. The "Pre-Teen Braves" return to the field to begin their clean-up effort, only to discover that the "Cavalry Kids," of which Milhouse and his father are members, have already done the job. The two groups go to war and try to outdo each other in doing good. When the opportunity to become batboys at a Springfield Isotopes game is on the line, the two sides redouble their efforts for their candy sales. The "Pre-Teen Braves" lace the "Cavalry Kids'" candy bars with laxatives and believe they are going to win.

Unfortunately for them, the senior citizens, in a need of relief from constipation, buy the "Cavalry Kids" a win. At the Isotopes game, the "Cavalry Kids" are delayed from arriving and the "Pre-Teen Braves" take their place singing their version of the national anthem. The crowd becomes angered by the version of the anthem that is being sung and when the real "Cavalry Kids" arrive, a fight breaks out between everyone in the crowd. When the image of Marge crying is shown on the Jumbotron, the fighting ends, with The Sea Captain suggesting that they not sing a "hymn to war, like our National Anthem, but a sweet soothing hymn like the national anthem of Canada". Everyone present sings and joins hands to form a maple leaf on the baseball field. In the end, Bart and Milhouse sum it up by saying that they've learned that: "War is not the answer ""except to all of America's problems."
Intro Gags
SANDWICHES SHOULD NOT CONTAIN SAND
The living room is a dollhouse and the family are picked up by a baby.
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