The Way We Weren't
Production Code
Episode Number
09 May 2004
J. Stewart Burns
Mike B. Anderson
Executive Producer
Al Jean
Jimmy Heenan
Plot When Homer and Bart fight over the use of a beer bottle Milhouse wants to use to kiss girls, it lands them in the Simpson family court, with Lisa presiding as judge. Marge, giving a testimony, tells the kids that when she was in high school, she had her first kiss with Homer, but Homer confesses that it was not his first kiss. Homer recalls that when he was 10, he went to a camp for underprivileged boys, Camp See-A-Tree, where Homer meets Lenny, Carl, and as a counselor, Moe. It turns out the summer camp is more like a prison and they go to work in the kitchen at a rich girls' camp across the lake. Homer finds a retainer and returns it to the girl who lost it, though he cannot see her (they are separated by the kitchen wall). She wants Homer to see her later that night. He does so, even though due to an accident with a switchblade he is wearing an eye patch. He tells Bart and Lisa that she was the prettiest girl he had ever met until he later met their mother, but Marge admits that she was that girl Homer met.

Marge gives her side of the story, saying that she was with Patty and Selma, Helen Lovejoy, Luann Van Houten and Cookie Kwan at their camp, "Camp Land-A-Man". At camp, Marge burns her hair with an iron by accident, turning it brown and she explains that is why Homer did not recognize her in high school. She meets Homer (who gives her a false name, Elvis Jagger Abdul-Jabbar) and they kiss. They agree that the following night they will meet again, but Homer does not come. Marge mentions that she could not trust another boy for years. Homer says he did not return for another date because he fell off a cliff into the lake and drifted to a fat camp, "Camp Flab-Away", which counted Mayor Quimby, Chief Wiggum and Comic Book Guy as its participants. Although Homer escapes the fat camp and makes his way to Marge's camp, Marge has left the camp only seconds before he arrives, leaving Homer to be sexually harassed by Patty and Selma. Marge now knows the truth and forgives him, but she thinks that Homer won't be able to preserve their love for long. Homer disproves it by showing half of the heart he kept. Marge also kept hers (though for different reasons), and the two snuggle happily in their bed.
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